Early Childhood: Your Creative and Playful 3 Year Old

Three-year-olds are such curious, playful, imaginative individuals!

Seeing your child grow right before your very eyes is wonderful and exciting. And watching them interact with you and others is such a gift.

Conversations have started to feel more interesting as your preschooler can say longer sentences and have more back-and-forth interaction with you. They also continue to come into their own, engaging in problem-solving and imaginative play.

Early Childhood Development: Your Young Preschooler at 3 Years Old

Vocabulary Development

Speech is yet another thing that children develop at their own pace. But a child between the ages of 3 and 4 will typically be able to say between 500 and 900 words!(2) By now, they’ll be able to talk in longer sentences of roughly 4 to 5 words, leading to real conversations with you.(4)

In preschool, your 3-year-old will be building reading and vocabulary skills. They’ll learn simple rhymes, poems, or songs and name colors and objects in their classroom.(3) They’ll also build fine motor skills as they create arts and craft projects and practice writing letters and their name.(3)

Your 3-year-old will also begin to understand the size differences between “little” and “big,” understand long sentences, and even know prepositions such as “on,” “under,” and behind!(2) Discuss what they did yesterday versus what they are doing today to encourage their grasp on the past tense.   

Growing Imagination

As your child’s imagination is growing and expanding, they’ll go on many wonderful adventures! They might sail the high seas in a cardboard box, or traverse a jungle across your kitchen. And while your preschooler’s growing imagination brings many wonderful moments of joy and play, it can also spark some fears.

Don’t be alarmed if your child also begins to display a fear of the dark or monsters under the bed as their imagination expands.(10) Because your child has likely seen television, movies, and been in the care of others by this age, their imagination will take flight sometimes. This can activate anxiety or fear. The best thing to do is acknowledge your child’s very real fear, but reassure them that the monsters are not real.

Early Childhood Development: 3-Year-Old Milestones

Social/Emotional Checklist(1)

• Quickly calms (within 10 minutes) after you leave (such as for preschool drop-off)

• Is interested in playing with other children

• With support, can problem solve

• Displays affection and concern for others without being prompted(7)

• Copies others (e.g., runs when friends or other children run)(7)

• Displays a wide range of feelings(7)

• Enjoys routines (and may get upset with a major change in routine)(7)

Language/Communication Checklist(1)

• Asks questions such as, “who,” “what,” “where,” “why,” and “how”

• Can name the action they see in a picture when asked (such as “sleeping”)

• Can say their first name when asked

• Is able to have short conversations with you (at least two back-and-forth exchanges)

• Speaks well enough that other people understand them (most of the time)

• After you read a book to them, they can retell the story(4)

Movement and Physical Development Checklist(2)

• Can run, jump, and walk up stairs without help

• Can ride a tricycle

• Is able to wash and dry their hands

• Is able to use a fork and spoon well(1)

• Can dress himself or herself(1)

• Can string items together (like macaroni)(1)

• Able to hold a pencil, marker or crayon to color and draw(4)

Cognitive Checklist(1)

• Can draw a circle when shown how

• Doesn’t touch a hot stove when warned not to

• Uses imagination to play and create stories(7)

• May be afraid of monsters under the bed or the dark(9)
  
  

What You Can Do to Encourage Healthy Development in Your 3-Year-Old

Encourage Problem Solving

Offer support, but don’t solve every problem for your child. Instead, encourage problem-solving and a can-do attitude. Ask questions to help your 3-year-old not only comprehend the problem or situation they’re facing, but also to help them think of solutions to try.(1)

For example, if you have a little extra time on a grocery run with your child, use the opportunity to engage in problem solving.(5) Try saying something like, “To bake cookies we need to buy butter, sugar, and flour. We have butter and flour in the cart. What are we missing?”

Model Problem Solving

You have the opportunity to be a wonderful role model for your child. Show them how you problem solve to encourage them to do it in their own lives as they grow up.

For example, perhaps you accidentally knock over a glass of milk, and it spills onto the floor. Do your best to remain calm. Take a deep breath. If your child is nearby, you could say something like, “Oops! I spilled some milk. How should I clean it up?”(5)

Don’t expect yourself to be perfect. Accidents happen. Some teachable moments will be missed opportunities. But try to give yourself the space (at least some of the time) to make and acknowledge your mistakes out loud to model problem solving in action.(5)

Ask Your Child Open-Ended Questions

Asking open-ended questions is a wonderful way to stimulate your child’s creativity, stretch their reasoning abilities, and foster independence and curiosity.(6) Questions that have a one word answer, such as, “What animal is that?” certainly have their place in your child’s development. But make space for more open-ended questions too, like, “Can you tell me about your stuffed animal?”(6)

Open-ended questions may be met with a pause as your child mulls things over. Be patient and give them time to respond. You might just be delighted by what they tell you!

Here are some other examples of open-ended questions you can ask:(6)

• Can you tell me about what you saw?

• What did you see happening at the park/zoo/grocery store/mall?

• Do you have any other ideas?

• Can you help me think of a new way to do this?

• What happened at the beginning of the story? What about the middle or end?

Create Space for Imaginative Play

Imaginative play is such a beautiful part of childhood. When your preschooler is playing pretend, creating stories about made up characters, turning everyday objects into parts of their magical world, or imagining themselves as an astronaut or a wizard, anything feels possible. And the freedom that comes with imaginative play allows them to explore emotions, develop empathy, learn negotiation and problem-solving skills, and develop their language and abstract thinking capabilities.(8)

If space allows, offer a place for a small stash of props or safe objects your child can play with such as empty boxes, clothes, stuffed animals, household utensils or plastic tools, markers, construction paper and tape. Then step back and watch your child’s imagination come to life.

Every Stage Comes With Joys and Challenges

Each step of the way, you have the opportunity to help your child learn and grow. Subscribe to my newsletter for more helpful parenting tips, and don’t miss the other blogs in the infant and early childhood development series!

References

1. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/milestones/milestones-3yr.html

2. https://www.stanfordchildrens.org/en/topic/default?id=the-growing-child-3-year-olds-90-P02296

3. https://www.scholastic.com/parents/school-success/school-success-guides/guide-to-preschool.html

4. https://www.verywellfamily.com/3-year-old-developmental-milestones-2764712

5. https://www.rasmussen.edu/degrees/education/blog/problem-solving-for-preschoolers/

6. https://www.decal.ga.gov/documents/attachments/Questions_Children_Think.pdf

7. https://helpmegrowmn.org/HMG/DevelopMilestone/3Years/index.html

8. https://www.babycenter.com/child/3-years-old/your-3-3-4-year-old-pretend-play_10329670

9. https://www.healthywa.wa.gov.au/Articles/A_E/Child-development-3-4-years

10. https://www.firstfiveyears.org.au/child-development/when-your-child-has-a-fear-of-the-dark

Toddler Development: Your Chatty and Curious 31 to 36 Month-Old

How fast children grow! Your child is already almost three years old. You may be wondering where the time goes.

At this stage, you probably can’t get your toddler to stop asking questions and asserting his independence! And with good reason. There are many things your toddler can do by himself at this age and the wide world fascinates him.

Watch in amazement as your toddler tackles so many tasks all on his own! He can ride a tricycle, put on his shoes, brush his teeth and say his name.

You’ve done such a great job helping him grow. And the learning will only continue. The world delights and surprises him at every turn.

Let’s see what else you can expect from your 31- to 36-month-old and how you can encourage his healthy development.  

Toddler Development: Your Toddler from 31 to 36 Months

Vocabulary Development

Your 36-month-old can already say 900 to 1000 words!(1) This probably doesn’t come as too much of a shock—I bet you can’t get your three-year-old to stop talking! You’ve done such a great job facilitating your toddler’s vocabulary development by reading, singing, and talking to them. Give yourself a pat on the back and keep engaging with them as they grow.

At this age, your toddler wants to know how everything works. You’ve probably noticed your toddler asks a ton of questions. Some of them you may not know how to answer! Don’t be afraid to encourage their exploration further. Head to the library to pick up a children’s book on the topic of their choice. Read it together and talk about what you learned.

Potty Training

If your child wasn’t previously ready to use the potty, don’t worry. 18 to 36 months is a big age range to start toilet training. Many children don’t start potty training until they’re on the older end of the spectrum.(2) The “right time” varies widely from child to child. Using the toilet is a skill your child has to learn, just like having to learn to walk, talk, and use a spoon or a cup!(2)

You can tell your child is ready for potty training if they:(2) 

• Begin to show an interest (e.g. they want to be dry and clean, they want to wear “big kid” underwear, they wonder what happens when you go to the bathroom)

• Stay dry for two hours or longer when they’re awake

• Wake up with a dry diaper

• Are aware when they need to go (e.g. they pee/poop in private or point to their diaper as they’re going)

• Show independence by saying they can do it themselves (e.g. feeding, dressing)

• Can follow directions and communicate well with you

• Are able to sit still

• Can run and walk well

• Can undress themselves

It can be challenging to know when your toddler is ready to start potty training. But if you keep an eye out for the signs outlined above, you’ll be well on your way. Going to the bathroom independently on the toilet is an exciting skill to develop! Waiting until your child is emotionally and physically ready will put them on a successful path for potty training. 

Toddler Development: Milestones from 31 to 36 Months

Social/Emotional Checklist(3)

• After you leave your child (e.g. for a childcare drop off) they calm down within 10 minutes of your departure

• Notices other children and plays with them

Language/Communication Checklist

• Has conversations with you (you take turns speaking in at least two back-and-forth interactions)

• Asks questions like, “why?” and “what?” and “where?”

• Speaks well enough that others understand what they’re saying most of the time

• Names what’s happening in a picture book when prompted (e.g. “Running!”)

• When asked, says their name

Movement and Physical Development Checklist

• Can use a fork

• Dresses him or herself some of the time

• Can string items together (e.g. beads)

Cognitive Checklist

• Able to draw a circle when shown how

• Doesn’t touch hot or dangerous objects when warned (e.g. a hot stove)

What You Can Do to Encourage Healthy Development in Your 31- to 36-Month-Old

Encourage Free Play

Having the freedom to express creativity through play is very important for your child’s development. Allow your child to follow his or her interests on a regular basis when they’re playing.(3) Research shows that free play, whether with friends or alone, improves children’s social skills, teaches them to be more resilient, and reduces anxiety.(7) When engaging in free play, your child should be allowed to choose where they play (within reason), what they play with (as long as it’s safe), and what kinds of subjects they explore.(4) Because every child is unique, self-expression will come out in free play in varied ways.(4) Some children will choose to color. Others will play with Legos. The sky’s the limit with free play! Free play also encourages problem-solving skills in addition to boosting creativity.(4)  

Teach Empathy

Give your child a chance to practice recognizing how other people feel. Show them pictures of children expressing a variety of emotions.(7) This will help them learn to identify fear, anger, sadness, frustration, joy, etc. in others. Teach your child about these emotions and give them the language to label them. Walk your child through what they can do if they see another child expressing those emotions. For example, if another child looks sad, you might ask, “Why do you think he feels sad? What could you do to help her feel better?” Teaching empathy takes time and lots of practice. But it is so worth it.

Name Their Feelings

Often children throw tantrums because they don’t feel heard, seen, understood, or listened to. If your child starts to cry because they can’t get their sweater on, resist the urge to say, “Stop crying.” Instead, name what they’re likely feeling. “You’re feeling frustrated because your arm won’t go into your sweater! Getting dressed can be hard sometimes. Would you like help?” By validating your child’s feelings, they’ll feel understood. You’re also giving them a valuable lesson in recognizing how they feel. Over time, they’ll be able to identify how they’re feeling and where those feelings arise in their body.

Continue to Set Clear Boundaries

Communicate limits to your child consistently so your expectations are clear. But do this in your normal voice! Being firm and clear does not mean having to yell. When possible, give clear and firm warnings, such as, “In five minutes it will be time to leave the park and go home for dinner.” If your toddler tests that limit, explain what the consequence will be and stick to it. “If you don’t get off the slide right now, you won’t be allowed to play with your musical book later.”

 

 

Every Stage Comes With Joys and Challenges

Each step of the way, you have the opportunity to help your child learn and grow. Subscribe to my newsletter for more helpful parenting tips, and don’t miss the other blogs in the infant and early childhood development series!

References

1. https://edn.ne.gov/cms/developmental-milestones-31-through-36-months

2. https://www.verywellfamily.com/signs-your-toddler-is-ready-to-potty-train-290259

3. https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/actearly/milestones/milestones-3yr.html

4. https://www.unicef.org/parenting/child-care/what-is-free-play

5. https://www.thebump.com/toddler-month-by-month/36-month-old

6. https://www.theparentline.org/infant-toddler-development/31-36-months/

7. http://thedanishway.com/do-you-know-why-free-play-is-important-for-your-children/

8. Alexander, J. J., & Sandahl, I. (2016, August 9). The Danish Way of Parenting: What the Happiest People in the World Know About Raising Confident, Capable Kids (1st ed.). TarcherPerigee.