Madeleine Vieira 12/15/22 Madeleine Vieira 12/15/22

Early Childhood Development: Your Helpful and Social 5 Year Old

Your five-year-old is coming into their own and soaking up everything like a sponge! They might enjoy potty humor and love to tell wild, imaginative stories, but they also want to contribute in real ways to your family. Whether they’re following your instructions on how to set the table or pulling weeds from the garden, they love to help out in meaningful ways.

Group of preschooler children looking down into camera

Your five year old is coming into their own and soaking up everything like a sponge! They might enjoy potty humor and love to tell wild, imaginative stories, but they also want to contribute in real ways to your family. Whether they’re following your instructions on how to set the table or pulling weeds from the garden, they love to help out in meaningful ways.

Early Childhood Development: Your 5 Year Old Preschooler and What to Expect

Vocabulary Development

Your child’s vocabulary is still growing and growing! On average, a five year old will know roughly 2,000 words.(2) The back-and-forth conversations are also getting longer, and typically five-year-olds say sentences that are at least five words long.(2) And boy do five year olds love to share their opinions!(1) Ask them questions, listen closely to their thoughtful explanations, and encourage them to tell stories. At this age, children also have longer attention spans, so they can follow multi-step instructions and do more complex projects.(1)

Motor Skills Development

Your five-year-old may have impressive gross motor skills! They’ll jump and climb, run and dance. You may find they’re interested in doing gymnastics, karate or ballet.(7) They’re also developing fine motor skills by using scissors, practicing writing their name, and drawing shapes.(7)

Whiney Behavior

If you have a five year old, you’ve certainly heard them whine. It’s an annoying behavior, but also completely normal at this development stage.(7) Whining peaks between ages 2 and 4, but your five year old may also whine when they’re expressing, “I need you and your help.”(7) Consider whether your child is tired, stressed, hungry, uncomfortable, or cranky.(7) It may also be a signal that they need more connection.

Early Childhood Development: 5 Year Old Milestones

Social/Emotional Checklist(3)

Knows how to follow rules and take turns when playing with other children
Can do simple chores like matching socks when sorting the laundry
Likes to sing, dance, or act for you
Wants to be liked and tries to please their friends(4)
Demonstrates independence(4)
Follows rules (most of the time)(4)

Language/Communication Checklist(3)

After you read or tell a story to them, can answer simple questions about it
Tells stories with at least two events
Has conversations with more than three back-and-forth exchanges
Recognizes or says simple rhymes, like cat and rat
Uses the future tense(4)
Talk about people by their relationship to others, like “Melissa’s mom” or “Justin’s cat”(4)
Understands the relationship between people and objects, such as “the girl who is kicking the ball”(4)

Movement and Physical Development Checklist(3)

Can hop on one foot
Able to button some buttons
Can swing, climb, do somersaults, and maybe skip(4)
Toilet trained, though they may still wet the bed occasionally(4)
Eats with a fork and spoon(4)
Is able to dress/undress themselves(4)

Cognitive Checklist(3)

Can write some of the letters in their name
Recognizes most of the letters in the alphabet 4)
Knows their address and phone number by heart(4)
Can draw people with a head, body, arms and legs(4)
Can count to 10
When you point to numbers between 1 and 5, can name some of them
Uses words to show an understanding of time, like “yesterday” or “night”
Knows what basic household objects are used for(4)
Can focus for 5 to 10 minutes on an activity like arts and crafts, story time, or another non-screen activity
Knows their colors and directional words like “over” or “next to”(2)
Follows instructions with three or fewer steps like, “Grab your lunch, put on your coat, and wait by the door”(2)

What You Can Do to Encourage Healthy Development in Your 5 Year Old

Give Your Child Meaningful Tasks

Preschoolers love to be helpful. They enjoy feeling like they’re contributing in a meaningful way. Give your child simple household chores to build their self-esteem and teach cooperation and responsibility.(5) Let them set the table, bring in the newspaper, water the flowers, or do other age-appropriate chores around the house.

Encourage Movement

Recreational sports are a great way for your child to learn how to be a good sport, play fairly, cooperate with teammates, and take turns. (5) Even if your child isn’t signed up for team sports, encourage them to move! Preschoolers are recommended to get at least three hours of physical activity per day.(6)

Play Together

While recreational sports are a fun way to move, make friends, and learn how to play on a team, they don’t replace the importance of playing with you! Spending quality time together will allow you to bond and give your child a chance to express their thoughts and share their feelings with you.(5) And don’t forget that playtime is an excellent sign to practice learning, too! When you’re at the park or talking a walk around your neighborhood, ask your child to practice reading signs to you! Or if you’re playing hopscotch, ask your child to draw the numbers with sidewalk chalk.

Set up Play Dates With Friends

By the time they’re five years old, children show an interest in being social, interacting with other children, and communicating back and forth with others.(7) But even outgoing, gregarious children can sometimes feel shy in new or uncertain situations. Setting up play dates before your child goes to kindergarten can help ease the transition to school.

Every Stage Comes With Joys and Challenges

Each step of the way, you have the opportunity to help your child learn and grow. Subscribe to my newsletter for more helpful parenting tips, and don’t miss the other blogs in the infant and early childhood development series!

References

Madeleine Vieira 10/17/22 Madeleine Vieira 10/17/22

Early Childhood: Your Creative and Playful 3 Year Old

Three-year-olds are such curious, playful, imaginative individuals!

Seeing your child grow right before your very eyes is wonderful and exciting. And watching them interact with you and others is such a gift.

Conversations have started to feel more interesting as your preschooler can say longer sentences and have more back-and-forth interaction with you. They also continue to come into their own, engaging in problem-solving and imaginative play.

Three-year-olds are such curious, playful, imaginative individuals!

Seeing your child grow right before your very eyes is wonderful and exciting. And watching them interact with you and others is such a gift.

Early Childhood Development: Your Young Preschooler at 3 Years Old

Vocabulary Development

Speech is yet another thing that children develop at their own pace. But a child between the ages of 3 and 4 will typically be able to say between 500 and 900 words!(2) By now, they’ll be able to talk in longer sentences of roughly 4 to 5 words, leading to real conversations with you.(4)

In preschool, your 3-year-old will be building reading and vocabulary skills. They’ll learn simple rhymes, poems, or songs and name colors and objects in their classroom.(3) They’ll also build fine motor skills as they create arts and craft projects and practice writing letters and their name.(3)

Your 3-year-old will also begin to understand the size differences between “little” and “big,” understand long sentences, and even know prepositions such as “on,” “under,” and behind!(2) Discuss what they did yesterday versus what they are doing today to encourage their grasp on the past tense.

Growing Imagination

As your child’s imagination is growing and expanding, they’ll go on many wonderful adventures! They might sail the high seas in a cardboard box, or traverse a jungle across your kitchen. And while your preschooler’s growing imagination brings many wonderful moments of joy and play, it can also spark some fears.

Don’t be alarmed if your child also begins to display a fear of the dark or monsters under the bed as their imagination expands.(10) Because your child has likely seen television, movies, and been in the care of others by this age, their imagination will take flight sometimes. This can activate anxiety or fear. The best thing to do is acknowledge your child’s very real fear, but reassure them that the monsters are not real.

Early Childhood Development: 3-Year-Old Milestones

Social/Emotional Checklist(1)

Quickly calms (within 10 minutes) after you leave (such as for preschool drop-off)
Is interested in playing with other children
With support, can problem solve
Displays affection and concern for others without being prompted(7)
Copies others (e.g., runs when friends or other children run)(7)
Displays a wide range of feelings(7)
Enjoys routines (and may get upset with a major change in routine)(7)

Language/Communication Checklist(1)

Asks questions such as, “who,” “what,” “where,” “why,” and “how”
Can name the action they see in a picture when asked (such as “sleeping”)
Can say their first name when asked
Is able to have short conversations with you (at least two back-and-forth exchanges)
Speaks well enough that other people understand them (most of the time)
After you read a book to them, they can retell the story(4)

Movement and Physical Development Checklist(2)

Can run, jump, and walk up stairs without help
Can ride a tricycle
Is able to wash and dry their hands
Is able to use a fork and spoon well(1)
Can dress himself or herself(1)
Can string items together (like macaroni)(1)
Able to hold a pencil, marker or crayon to color and draw(4)

Cognitive Checklist(1)

Can draw a circle when shown how
Doesn’t touch a hot stove when warned not to
Uses imagination to play and create stories(7)
May be afraid of monsters under the bed or the dark(9)

What You Can Do to Encourage Healthy Development in Your 3-Year-Old

Encourage Problem Solving

Offer support, but don’t solve every problem for your child. Instead, encourage problem-solving and a can-do attitude. Ask questions to help your 3-year-old not only comprehend the problem or situation they’re facing, but also to help them think of solutions to try.(1)

For example, if you have a little extra time on a grocery run with your child, use the opportunity to engage in problem solving.(5) Try saying something like, “To bake cookies we need to buy butter, sugar, and flour. We have butter and flour in the cart. What are we missing?”

Model Problem Solving

You have the opportunity to be a wonderful role model for your child. Show them how you problem solve to encourage them to do it in their own lives as they grow up.

For example, perhaps you accidentally knock over a glass of milk, and it spills onto the floor. Do your best to remain calm. Take a deep breath. If your child is nearby, you could say something like, “Oops! I spilled some milk. How should I clean it up?”(5)

Don’t expect yourself to be perfect. Accidents happen. Some teachable moments will be missed opportunities. But try to give yourself the space (at least some of the time) to make and acknowledge your mistakes out loud to model problem solving in action.(5)

Ask Your Child Open-Ended Questions

Asking open-ended questions is a wonderful way to stimulate your child’s creativity, stretch their reasoning abilities, and foster independence and curiosity.(6) Questions that have a one word answer, such as, “What animal is that?” certainly have their place in your child’s development. But make space for more open-ended questions too, like, “Can you tell me about your stuffed animal?”(6)

Open-ended questions may be met with a pause as your child mulls things over. Be patient and give them time to respond. You might just be delighted by what they tell you!

Here are some other examples of open-ended questions you can ask:(6)

Can you tell me about what you saw?
What did you see happening at the park/zoo/grocery store/mall?
Do you have any other ideas?
Can you help me think of a new way to do this?
What happened at the beginning of the story? What about the middle or end?

Create Space for Imaginative Play

Imaginative play is such a beautiful part of childhood. When your preschooler is playing pretend, creating stories about made up characters, turning everyday objects into parts of their magical world, or imagining themselves as an astronaut or a wizard, anything feels possible. And the freedom that comes with imaginative play allows them to explore emotions, develop empathy, learn negotiation and problem-solving skills, and develop their language and abstract thinking capabilities.(8)

If space allows, offer a place for a small stash of props or safe objects your child can play with such as empty boxes, clothes, stuffed animals, household utensils or plastic tools, markers, construction paper and tape. Then step back and watch your child’s imagination come to life.

Every Stage Comes With Joys and Challenges

References

Madeleine Vieira 9/26/22 Madeleine Vieira 9/26/22

What to Feed Your Toddler and When! Plus: How to Deal With Picky Eaters

Does your toddler change their mind about foods at the drop of a hat? One day they love peas and carrots and the next they’re looking at them with utter disgust? Welcome to toddlerhood and the joys of trying to get your little one to eat!

Feeding a toddler can feel – like many things at this age – overwhelming or frustrating.

Assuming your toddler doesn’t have any known allergies, they can eat from all the basic food groups. If your family has a history of food allergies, talk to your child’s pediatrician about how to start introducing foods to your toddler.(1)

Toddler eating bite-sized fruit in a highchair

Feeding a toddler can feel – like many things at this age – overwhelming or frustrating.

Dairy Foods for Toddlers

Before your baby turns one, breast milk or formula is best.(2) But once your child hits the 12-month mark, you can start to introduce whole milk.(2) When your toddler turns two, you can switch to reduced-fat milk.(2) If your family has a history of obesity, high cholesterol, or heart disease, ask your child’s pediatrician about switching to reduced-fat milk earlier.(2)

Your toddler might enjoy:(1)

Milk
Yogurt
Diced or grated cheese
Cottage cheese
Pudding
Cheesy scrambled eggs or cheesy omelet

Getting Toddlers to Eat Fruits and Veggies

You can introduce raisins once your toddler is 18 months or older. Since raisins tend to clump together, try feeding them to your toddler one at a time and in small portions. 2 tablespoons or less is usually what’s recommended.

A whole world of foods opens up once your toddler’s teeth come in! Dice crunchy vegetables into bite-sized chunks (about the size of a frozen pea is a good rule of thumb). Start with 1 to 2 tablespoons of diced fruit or veggies and then add a tablespoon for each year of your child’s age.(2)

Your toddler might enjoy:

Raisins
Fresh fruit
Canned fruit
Diced carrots
Diced green peppers
Sliced grapes
Sliced cherry tomatoes
Sliced celery
Sliced cucumber
Veggie quesadilla

But don’t be surprised if your toddler becomes less and less excited about eating their vegetables as they get older! Listen to this podcast episode for more information on why toddlers tend to turn up their noses at vegetables. You might just be surprised by what you find out!

Protein Foods for Toddlers

Cut proteins into small, bite-sized pieces to reduce the risk of choking. Nut butters like peanut butter should be thinly spread on crackers or bread because of the sticky texture, rather than given in large spoonfuls.

Your toddler might enjoy:

Meat
Poultry
Fish (carefully remove any bones)
Eggs
Beans
Tofu
Nut butters

Whole Grains for Toddlers

You may have to get creative with feeding your toddler. Try making meal times fun by making happy face pancakes or letting them sprinkle seasoning on their food. A little bit of effort can go a long way in getting a toddler excited about mealtime!

Your toddler might enjoy:

Oats
Whole grain bread
Buckwheat pancakes
Cereal
Crackers
Pretzels
Pasta
Rice
Bagels
Tortillas

What About Allergens?

You may have heard that the American Academy of Pediatrics now recommends for infants to eat high-allergen foods as early as 4 to 6 months old if your family doesn’t have a history of food allergies.(2) If you do have a family history of allergies, consult with your toddler’s pediatrician before introducing the most common high-allergen foods, including: wheat, soy, tree nuts, peanuts, milk, eggs, corn, seeds, shellfish or fish.(2)

It’s wise to introduce new foods one at a time so it’s easy to track if your toddler does have an allergic reaction or if a food doesn’t agree with them.(2)

How to Deal With a “Picky Eater”

Many parents complain that their children are picky eaters. If you have a toddler, I’m sure you’ve engaged in a battle of wills about whether or not they’ll eat something you’re serving for dinner. But I encourage you to try not to label your children as “picky eaters” – you might just find that the label sticks. Try not to refer to your child as such if you don’t want them to identify with this label as they get older.

As many as 50% of children between the ages of 2 and 4 years old are perceived as “picky eaters” by their parents,(3,7) so please know this is a very common behavior amongst young children. I’m sure I don’t have to tell you that family conflicts, behavior problems, tantrums, and fighting between parents about how to deal with their child’s picky eating are all common consequences of children refusing certain foods.(3)

Neophobia is the reluctance to taste or try new foods.(4) And there’s more and more evidence suggesting that texture, taste, appearance and the smell of the food all influence whether a child will want to eat it or not.(4)

The truth is, more often than not, it’s just hard to get children to eat their veggies, so please know you are not a bad parent if you struggle with this.

Avoid Power Struggles at Meal Time

Have you ever put something in front of your toddler and had them refuse it? It can be incredibly frustrating when your child turns up his or her nose at the meal you’ve graciously prepared for them. And on top of your frustration, you’re also worried about whether or not they’re getting the nutrition they need to grow a healthy, strong body.

Many parents and physicians believe in allowing your toddler the option to refuse foods they’re served. That’s right – it’s your job to provide the healthy meals, but it’s not your job to force them to eat it. Toddler stomachs are small! So let your toddler choose what and how much they actually want to eat.(9) You can still serve them the same thing you’re having for dinner, but allow your toddler to make a choice about what and how much of it they eat rather than engaging in a power struggle over the meal.

It’s also normal for your toddler’s appetite to vary from day to day. Try to look at their nutrition broadly rather than meal by meal.

Many of us may have been taught to “eat everything off the plate” before we could be excused when we were children. But it’s important to teach your child to learn how to recognize and respect their bodily cues telling them when they’re hungry or full.

Interested in Learning More?

Check out this podcast episode for more information on toddler eating behaviors, including research that explains why it can be so difficult to get your toddler to eat!

Equip yourself with knowledge and tools to help your child thrive. And be sure to subscribe to the Genius Little Minds podcast so you never miss an episode!

References

https://www.babycenter.com/toddler/feeding/age-by-age-guide-to-feeding-your-toddler_1736045
https://www.parents.com/toddlers-preschoolers/feeding/healthy-eating/toddler-food-guide-introducing-new-foods/
Werthmann, J., Jansen, A., Havermans, R., Nederkoorn, C., Kremers, S., & Roefs, A. (2015). Bits and pieces. Food texture influences food acceptance in young children. Appetite, 84, 181–187. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.appet.2014.09.025
Coulthard, H., & Thakker, D. (2015). Enjoyment of tactile play is associated with lower food neophobia in preschool children. Journal of the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics, 115(7), 1134–1140. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jand.2015.02.020
https://www.fspediatrics.com/docs/Feeding-toddlers-at-the-table-handout.pdf
https://www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/why-do-children-dislike-vegetables/
Carruth, B. R., Ziegler, P. J., Gordon, A., & Barr, S. I. (2004). Prevalence of picky eaters among infants and toddlers and their caregivers' decisions about offering a new food. Journal of the American Dietetic Association, 104(1 Suppl 1), s57–s64. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jada.2003.10.024
https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/toddler-meals.html
https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/managing-meals-how-to-take-struggles-out-of-mealtime-with-kids-0424184
https://www.todaysparent.com/kids/kids-health/age-by-age-guide-to-feeding-babies-toddlers-and-kids/

Madeleine Vieira 9/12/22 Madeleine Vieira 9/12/22

Stages of Play: Funny Things Toddlers Do That Are Actually Play Schemas

Have you ever wondered about the funny things toddlers do?

Maybe you’ve chuckled because your toddler carries rocks around in her purse or insists on playing with a potato instead of other children.

What looks like plain old silliness to you is actually the exploration of play schemas!

Play is how your child learns.(1) And it’s so important for healthy brain development that it’s actually been recognized as a basic human right all children should have access to by the United Nations Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights.(2)

That’s right – play has been deemed a right that all children should have access to in addition to rest, leisure, and love.(2)

Have you ever wondered about the funny things toddlers do?

Maybe you’ve chuckled because your toddler carries rocks around in her purse or insists on playing with a potato instead of other children.

What looks like plain old silliness to you is actually the exploration of play schemas!

That’s right – play has been deemed a right that all children should have access to in addition to rest, leisure, and love.(2)

Parten’s 6 Stages of Play

Children actually progress through 6 stages of play development during early childhood.(3)
These 6 stages are defined as follows:

1. Unoccupied Play (0-3 months)

This is when your baby learns how their body moves and explores the things around them.(3)

2. Solitary Play (0 – 2 years)

In solitary play, your child entertains himself by playing alone. He’s not interested in playing with others just yet.

3. Onlooker or Spectator Play (2 years)

If your toddler is content to just watch other children play at the park, she’s engaging in onlooker play.

4. Parallel Play (2+ years)

This is when children play beside each other but aren’t yet playing with each other.

5. Associative Play (3-4 years)

Your child is (finally!) showing an interest in playing with peers, indicating a significant shift in their development.

6. Cooperative Play (4+ years)

Cooperative play involves playing with others and working toward a common objective or purpose, like building a snowman or finishing a puzzle together.(5)

Each play stage has different benefits. Listen to this podcast episode for more information!

Toddlers and Sharing

Sharing is a big concern parents have. No one wants to raise the most selfish kid on the playground! But sharing is a skill that must be learned. Most children don’t develop this skill until they are 3 and a half or four years old.(6) So please don’t expect your young toddler to know how to share!

You can teach your older toddler to share by modeling it. Play cooperative games together and do things together that require taking turns.(7) Walk your toddler through the steps by saying things like, “It’s your turn to place a block on the tower, then it’s my turn to place a block. Then it’s your turn again! When we share the blocks, we both get to have fun.”

Practice, practice, practice, and don’t forget to be patient – with both yourself and your kiddo.

Types of Schemas in Play

Your toddler probably engages in some pretty funny, frustrating, and undesirable behaviors. When they do things that drive you mad – like repeatedly throwing food off of their high chair, for example -- you may think they’re just misbehaving or being “bad” when really, they’re exploring a play schema.

Trajectory

When you’re trying to serve your family dinner, it can be hard to share your toddler’s enthusiasm for throwing food all over the floor. Understandably so! But your toddler is curious about how things fall, wondering if their pasta will bounce, smash, or splatter when it drops. So what seems like a misbehavior on the surface is actually them engaging in what’s called the trajectory schema. They’re learning all about how objects fall and move.

Try This: Toss colorful scarves up in the air

Connecting

Does your toddler love Lincoln Logs or laying train tracks? In the connecting schema, your child is learning all about how things tie together or connect.

Try This: Make paper chains

Transporting

If your toddler is constantly carrying odd things around the house… a bag of rice, dirty socks, a potato… (I’ve heard it all!) they’re exploring the transportation schema.

Try This: Have them help by carrying (light and unbreakable!) groceries into the house

Positioning

In the positioning schema, your child is learning how to line things up and put them in groups. If your child is arranging his toy cars by color and size, he’s exploring this schema.

Try This: Line up leaves you find at the park

Enveloping

Children explore the enveloping schema by wrapping things – or themselves – up! So if your child enjoys wrapping toys up in blankets or covering himself in cream, you know what schema he’s exploring through play.

Try This: Wrap up a doll or teddy bear in bandages while playing doctor

Enclosing

This schema is all about creating boundaries and containing things within a defined space. If your child enjoys playing inside boxes or filling cups with water during bath time, they’re likely exploring this schema.

Try This: Color inside a shoebox or cardboard box

Rotation

If your child is obsessed with rolling around on the floor or being swung around, then they’ve discovered the rotation schema.

Try This: Turn keys in locks

Orientation

The world is so fascinating from different angles! Your toddler may want to sit on your shoulders, stand on a chair, or look at the world upside down when exploring this schema.

Try This: Toddler gymnastics

Transforming

If your toddler is fascinated by smashing Play Doh or watching ice melt, then the transforming schema has captured your toddler’s attention! They’re exploring how materials change, like going from a solid to a liquid and back to a solid again. Enjoy their curiosity while it lasts!

Try This: Add food coloring to water

Messy Play for Toddlers

It’s important for toddlers to explore with their senses! Research shows that motor and visual skills in early childhood are related to math and language skills as a child grows up.(7) So simple activities that build fine and gross motor skills are important.

Create a defined messy play area for your toddler so they know what’s okay and what isn’t. For example, you set out a tarp with supplies to signal the beginning of messy play. When it’s time for the tarp and supplies to be put away, messy play ends.(7) An organized environment makes messy play safer and sets up appropriate expectations for your toddler.

You may be thinking, “My child hates getting dirty! Messy play sounds like an absolute nightmare!” Some children are more sensitive to sensory input than others and don’t enjoy messy play.(7) And that’s OK! Every toddler is different and has different tolerance levels. Support your children in their exploration. Don’t force sensory play with textures they don’t enjoy.

Your toddler may prefer messy play that doesn’t make their hands wet, for example, so playing with loose papers or other textured materials that aren’t sticky will be more enjoyable for them.(7) Even walking barefoot in the grass or playing in a sandbox can be a wonderful sensory experience! It doesn’t have to be complicated to be impactful.

Try This: Make a dry sensory box with felt, feathers, grass, pom poms, or any other safe materials that interest your child.

Don’t Forget to Have Fun!

Remember, your little one won’t be little forever. Cherish these memories. Slow down your day. Marvel with your toddler at all the amazing, beautiful things life has to offer.

Interested in Learning More?

Check out this podcast episode for more information on toddler play! Learn more in-depth information about the stages of play and the seemingly odd ways your toddler may be exploring play schemas. Get even more ideas for sensory play that doesn’t involve food (to reduce food waste), and what to do if your toddler refuses to play outside — or with other kids.

Equip yourself with knowledge and tools to help your child thrive. And be sure to subscribe to the Genius Little Minds podcast so you never miss an episode!

References